The Poetry and Prose of Johanna Kaye Fugitt
Found among the silence,
reflecting upon the calm,
the face of my desires
moves quietly along the shore.
I look in front of me,
behind me he does not exist.
His form exists here,
across the river of my dreams.
Those eyes that speak so deep,
stare at me again,
awaiting with outstretched hand
for me to take that first step
to join him on that other shore,
to reach him where he stands.
Dare I join him,
or forever hide among the shadows.
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
I am surrounded by fools and morons,
for they speak of the need to be beautiful
as if it is a lifeline that cannot be cut.
But for me, it has been severed
since before I understood such beauty.
And yes, I too worship beauty,
but as the graceful swan
hiding inside my ugly ducking exterior
cries in vain for someone to see
within the walls of its confinement,
I would desire to see as well,
the beauty of someone’s soul
who is the mate to mine.
Is he here? In this world?
Or have I missed him entirely,
lost among the reeds of my prison?
The pond where I am stuck,
because no mate has appeared,
knowing the swan that lies beneath
and thus fly off with me by his side.
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
This is the beauty of my rapture,
a figure cloaked in dreams,
whose voice I have sought
since time was eternal.
I have chased the glory
of this enchantment
through my subconscious.
Through golden colored hills
have I called his name,
never knowing the sounds
that produced such.
I wandered through a land
where I was blind and deaf,
until in the midnight hues,
his figured walked into the moonshine
and my mystery was solved.
Into my reality, his figure resolved itself,
appearing in one dream
only to be seen in another,
until one day he spoke,
and I knew that voice
as I had always know it.
Yet being blind and deaf,
I knew not where the visions
and the sounds pointed to.
Until one day a hand showed the way,
and what I had always seen
appeared before my starving eyes,
and what I had always heard,
spoke again to these hungry ears.
I was able to see and hear,
where before the beauty of my rapture
I had been unable to know.
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
A song plays on in my mind,
never ending,
the melody infusing with my soul
as I look to the sky.
The cerulean blue reminds me
of the eyes of the man I adore.
I have said before
that to love him
would be like to love a god.
That may be truth,
but he is also a man,
and should I be cast down
then that risk shall be worth it.
For to love him
would be to love heaven,
a thing I can’t not do.
I see the many faces
as he is seen to the public
and I wonder what the man is like
in the darkness of his home.
Be he quiet or pensive,
I want to know the truth.
I realize, as I walk down
this rained out road,
that many have come before me
and my love is only just now realized,
but to love him is only the right thing
that I feel I can do.
Whether I meet him or not,
whether the dreams I have
include the realization of his sel f
in what is my reality or not,
I will move on without fear.
If I should be cast down
back to earth then so be it.
For love, only risks should be taken.
Otherwise, what is it we live for?
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
I will always see you smiling there.
The tears little rivers of sorrow
pouring out your heart to the world
while all stood back and watched,
enraptured with the beauty of your pain.
I cannot reach for you through this darkness,
my hands grasp at air.
Yet I hold on to it, hoping desperately to fly,
to be there for you when the world,
and its eternal apathy towards you,
crushes you underneath its indescribable weight.
All eyes follow you in your path.
They watch for each step,
hoping for that mistake
that would take you down,
make you real.
But I know you.
I can see with mine own eyes
past the veils of time,
the terrible sadness that lingers.
Amid this vigilant world,
I would find you there still,
the smile creasing your face
as you stood upon that pedestal
so precariously steady.
I would unfurl my wings,
rise to you and take your hand in mine,
to remove those tiny rivers
that cascade with such force
with the softness of my tongue,
and catch you if you fall.
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
My eyes open to a world unknown to me.
Breath catching, I look to the sky,
only to realize that earth is where I am.
A knife tears through my heart
As the pain tells me my wings are gone.
Torn from my body
with a force that left me aching.
I plead to the skies, begging,
only to hear naught but the wind
as it answers in its sorrowful wail.
Almost as if it cries for me,
the fallen one.
The sky opens up with thunder
and torrents fall.
Just as I did,
in a cruel mimicry of my descent.
I sit, hunched, soaked,
unable to tell which are mine
that trail down my skin
and which is of the sky.
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
Your black wings enshroud me as you rise over me.
You, the fallen one,
one so beautiful.
Too much so to have forsaken heaven
for the lonely girl who lays tortured beneath you.
Awakening taboo,
those hidden fantasies longed for in the dark
afraid of in the light.
I turn to liquid fire when your song touches my lips.
May I burn forever within this embrace.
Fly the night with me and delve deep into my secrets.
Keep them only for you.
Fill me with the taste of your desire.
Pull me down with you,
into the darkness.
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
I taste your song upon my tongue,
as your words caress my thighs.
Drown me in your sweet serenade.
The lotus of my desire,
I bloom before you
untouched, unknown.
Shivering skin awaits your unchained lust.
Fill me with your potion,
make what once was empty whole.
Still my trembling with the shuddering explosion
that sleeps within.
Ease this cruel torture
that cascades me over the edge of pleasure,
deep into the pool
where pain blurs the line.
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
Among the mists of time,
do I stand,
alone,
as I have always been.
Blue slit eyes
look to the sky,
searching,
hoping for one to come,
to save me from an eternity
that is my punishment.
Silver I used to be,
sleek and powerful,
I flew the skies,
strong and wild,
my bellows reaching
the mountains below,
but I am gone now.
This dragon fell to her death,
losing all hope that a mate,
beautiful and strong,
would save me from loneliness,
but alas,
my wings have swept the skies
to no avail.
No mate to be found,
no companion to stay at my side.
Gray have I become,
long may I live still,
but my heart no longer does.
Alone, tired, losing the battle,
I yell my cry to the heavens,
again wishing to find the mate
I forever have sought.
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
If I could change the tides, would I?
Would I change how things have become?
Probably. . .
It is my dearest wish to find him.
To see him standing there, waiting for me.
If I could change who I was,
make myself worthy of the love
that he would then give me.
I would. . .
No doubt is there for me.
The only doubts I would have are,
if it would happen the same way.
No, I would be different.
Bolder, more apt to lean over him,
to take his lips with mine.
And forge a bond with his body
that would break only when I died.
© Johanna Fugitt 2017
in the end i am yours 